And Upgrade to Life

At my November doctor's appointment, I discussed everything with my "new" doctor. I'd seen her once before and she came across as very understanding and empathetic. I was, and still am, very impressed with her. In that November visit, we went over all my meds and all my lifestyle choices. One thing I brought up was alcohol.

Since March of 2012, this has been wine.

I like sparkling grape juice so I didn't feel I was missing out on much. Alcohol and medications go through the liver and alcohol can cause problems with the liver and methotrexate. So, depending upon how much methotrexate you take, doctors will tell you not to drink so your liver just processes the drug, and not the alcohol. There could be liver damage. I decided, when diagnosed, that my health was more important than alcohol so it was not an issue to remove this from my life. I even created a "Poor Man's Mimosa".

I don't know why I haven't ever noticed these individual orange juice bottles before. I love orange juice but can't always consume a whole carton before it get, shall we say, "ripe".

But, since the middle of last year, I'd been reading a great deal of information on how alcohol in moderation is good for those with RA. It should be noted I'd seen studies conducted in Europe, but not much in the US. One of the RA sites I frequent commented on the older studies of the general population which detail how a glass of red wine at least 3 times a week, was beneficial to one's health. There was no mention of conflicts with methotrexate. So, can I or can't I? Dr. Francis said I shouldn't be drinking, period, in spite of what studies may be saying. Okay /shrug. I can live without alcohol. There are some cool mugs out there which liven up my non-alcoholic ways. Witness the mug my friend, Pam, gave me for my birthday.

(Yes, this celebration was at Steak 'n Shake.)

Still, there was enough "noise", if you will, over the alcohol issue that I raised the point with Dr. Gierut. What did she think of all of this? She said there are three schools of thought. One, the European school, feels one alcoholic drink, per day, is okay for people on any RA meds. European studies have not shown a correlation between moderate alcohol consumption with methotrexate, and liver damage. Many US doctors feel the studies are very flawed and no one taking methotrexate should drink alcohol. And there there are doctors, like her, who fall in the middle. If I limit myself to three drinks per week, she feels that's a good middle-of-the-road answer.

I did not, dear reader, rush out and toast this news of being able to break my abstinence, with a beer or 3. Nor have I rushed to Binny's Beverage Depot and purchased a shopping cart full of beverages. My first beer since 2012 was at the company Christmas party last December.

It was a vanilla porter. I've always said I like beers I can chew. I did go to Binny's to get beverages with which to ring in the New Year.

Oh Belhaven, how I have missed you. And you now have a stout? Yes, please. And I got a beverage with which to lace my hot cocoa.

In the years since I quit alcohol, Godiva discontinued their white chocolate flavor. No matter. This will be fine. I've consumed "so much" that I have one shot glass left in the bottle before I have to replace it. I'll drink hot cocoa at any time of year. When I'm feeling a lot of stress, it's a good relaxant. But, yeah. It's taken 6 months to finish the bottle off. I'm not in any danger of overconsumption.

Currently, there is a regional stout in the fridge. I bought it in, um, March, maybe? I wasn't a big drinker before the ban and I'm not going to be a big drinker now that I can. Three glasses of alcohol a week seems like a lot more than I was drinking before, even averaging an evening out where two or three might be consumed, with weeks of nothing.

Still, I see this as a victory of sorts. I'm doing well enough that I can, with great moderation, toast my friends or relatives with alcohol. The upcoming Disney trip features brunch with "all you can drink" mimosas. I love mimosas, which was why I replicated, somewhat, the taste. "All I can drink" might be a couple, but at least I can have a real one.

Beverage:  Dr Pepper

Deb

What a Mess

Houses are money sinks. Just when you get something fixed, something else needs your attention. This year, I've been lucky to find people willing to do things I can no longer do. One of those things was cleaning the gutters.

Prior to May, I don't remember when I last had them cleaned. On the north end of the house, in the front, small trees had taken root. Birds loved the gutters because bugs moved in. I would hear them digging around and would see the flying of debris as they emptied a spot and ate the insects. Squirrels had also taken to burying nuts in the gutters. I could always tell when this happened by what I'd find on the deck or front porch.

I kept telling myself that it didn't take much to get up there and clean them out. I have a ladder. I would just need to get some latex gloves to put under a pair of garden gloves I really didn't like very much and I could clean out the gutter myself. But climbing a ladder is difficult. I feel so unstable now and the need to climb to the top of the ladder made me very uneasy. I can wash windows because it's 2-3 rungs, but climbing 4-5 was a problem. Fortuitously, Pam was given a flyer from the son of one of her co-workers. He would clean gutters and do other yard work, including mowing and weeding. I took him up on the gutter cleaning.

What a mess.

It was a rainy afternoon when he showed up. I told him he could postpone the job but he said he was going to get wet anyway so rain didn't matter. This was the debris in the gutter section over the door. It was nasty; black and decaying. The smell was "ripe". He had a power washer and, after removing the debris from the gutters, cleaned the front steps and the deck. It took him a couple passes to clear everything off. In washing down the deck chair, he actually cleaned it. I was impressed.

The next day, I used power scrub for one final pass.

I didn't get the deck sealed, I just had too much to do this summer and I actually wanted to use my deck; sit on it, enjoy myself, and not spend a weekend painting. It needs to be sealed and it needs another thorough power washing.

The best part is that the heavy rains of the summer have actually gone into the gutters and down the downspouts as they are supposed to do, not slide straight off the roof. If the gutters are clear, a heavy rain helps to flush out any debris which might accumulate. The pine trees on the north side of the house sluff needles in May and that can clog gutters if there is anything in them. This year, nope. My gutters are clear at the start of fall. I probably should look them over before winter, once all the leaves have fallen, just to be sure. Clean your gutters, folks. You'll thank yourself even if the squirrels complain they have no easy place to bury food for the winter.

Beverage:  Water

Deb

Got Me

I'm working on a long-term project. I won't start in earnest until the after-Christmas sales, but we'll say it involves a Halloween costume pattern and fabric. As Halloween patterns are on sale right now PLUS I had coupons, I entered JoAnn Fabrics last Sunday with the blinders on to get one pattern and one pattern only.

Yeah, that didn't go so well.

The cat print was on the end of a row of splashy Halloween fabric. The way this particular store is laid out, you're going to see brightly colored, distinctive fabrics when you walk in. In the store where I take my stuff to be framed, I would not have seen this, but I wasn't going all the way up there for a pattern, when I knew my local JoAnn's would have it.

I resisted for about 10 minutes. I actually had to pull up the costume pattern and look at it, to make sure it will do what I need to have done. And then I started paging through the Simplicity book, looking at shirts. I have an ancient camp shirt pattern which I've used for a wide variety of shirts, but I had no idea how much material it took and there was nothing like it in any of the books. There was one shirt I liked mainly because of the location of the pockets. But the variation I really wanted, long torso and elbow-length sleeves, did not have a fabric amount on the back. I'm no good at estimating the amount of fabric needed. Here was this kimono-themed jacket. It's not lined and it's reasonably simple to assemble. There was a variation for contrasting trim. I liked the look of the pattern.

Now, Pam was not around to talk me out of this purchase. I was running errands on this date; groceries, Target, JoAnn, cat food. Probably, both the pattern and the fabric will be around at the end of December, but I could make this and have it for my trip to Virginia at the end of November. I'm going to do the contrasting trim in black satin. I almost bought blanket edging, instead of the satin, but I wasn't sure how it would work around the neck. The pattern piece is curved to accommodate the neck line. Blanket satin is not.

So, I am testament to the power of putting eye-catching items on the end of a row. The gal helping me liked this material as much as I did. I could see this as a vest with a quilted lining, since you can buy quilted fabric now. Add a gold shirt and a bow tie, topping the look off with a top hat and a cane, and you have a Halloween costume. I'd probably wear the vest year-round.

I need to make room on the table in the living room to cut this out and get it made. We won't talk about the boxes of fabric in the closet.

Beverage:  Water

Deb

Stitchery

This may be my lone cross-stitch project this year, it's hard to say. It is important to me to get this completed as it's going to be a wedding present for an end of June wedding. I need to have it done probably by the beginning of May so it can be framed in ample time. I thought about just getting it done and letting the couple get it framed, but they could be so busy that it never does.

The first thing we start with is the fabric. I knew exactly what I wanted. It's called "Stardust" and I've used it before several years ago, to do a cross stitch of the Eiffel Tower. "Stardust" is tough to find and I have only seen it at Hobby Lobby. It's become a bit of a chore to get to HL but I wasn't going to pay 20% more to order the fabric online. On one of our weekend luncheon excursions, Pam and I swung by HL where I could get the fabric. The Eiffel Tower was done on cream-colored fabric with gold glitter embedded. For this project, I wanted the very light gray with the silver glitter.

All set and with the colors for the project collected, I sat down to stitch. A couple hours and the form of the design is already taking shape.

Day 2.

Day 3 with more added color.

After day 4 stitching, it is clear what this is going to be.

I picked up the next color and realized I had miscounted. Around the dark circle, there should be two lines of color, not one. The dark color needs to be moved northeast, if you will, to allow for the additional color. My heart sank. Did I want to rip all the dark out? That adds time. Plus, I get down because I should have figured this out when I was stitching it. Could I just work around it?

The more I looked at the pattern and what I had stitched, the more I realized I couldn't make it work. If I really want this to look right, I have to remove the dark and do that area over. So, that's what I've done.

Has it set me back? Well, not really. Ripping out color is a chore, but once that was done, stitching went quickly to reform the circle so I don't make the mistake of miscounting. Now that this is fixed, I can go forward from here. The design is not the hard part, actually. The hard part is placing the wording. That's coming.

Beverage:  Dr Pepper

Deb

Spectacles

I saw my eye doctor back in October, two weeks before BlizzCon. There was a slight change in my prescription which would necessitate new glasses. I really like Coastal.com so called them to see about glasses. It was determined that I probably wouldn't get new glasses before leaving for California and I really didn't want them to come while I was gone, even though Pam was picking up the mail. I would order new glasses when I came back. In hindsight (isn't that generally the truth), I should have ordered glasses and had them waiting for me because I got busy and then I had other expenses and it was the receipt of my tax refund which spurred me to finally buy that new pair with the new prescription. It was time.

Here is the old pair.

In this light, the frames look black, but they were a dark navy blue. I liked them the first 6 months after getting them, but, since December, I had a problem with them sliding down my nose, even if I didn't bend over. I probably wouldn't have considered new glasses even with a tax refund if they hadn't been problematic. There's nothing you can do with plastic frames, about nose slide. They are formulated for a specific measurement.

With this problem in mind, I searched the Coastal site and found these.

I've gone back to a wire frame. The gal who helped me at Coastal said there is much more room to adjust the fit with wire frames than with plastic. I can adjust the nose pads and bend the glasses slightly to fit an odd size.

I went with a more pronounced blue and it's sparkly! I like the bigger lens size. Coastal was having a 50% off sale on lenses when I ordered. That's where eyeglass manufacturers get you. A $29 frame is nothing if you have to put no-line bifocals in them.

There's been a bit of an adjustment. I still take them off when I read or when I do cross-stitch. Sometimes, things are blurry in the distance, if I look through the bottom of the lens and not the top. It's about unlearning habits because the glasses I had were out of focus for me.

I expect this is what my life is going to be like going forward. There may, or may not, be an incremental shift in my sight and I'll need to get glasses roughly every year or 18 months. Dr. Park was very happy with my eyes, saying there is no sign of any RA complications affecting my sight. Any incremental shifts are simply age-related. Ah yes, age. I've been on this earth for a few years. Some day, when I'm bored, I should try to figure out how many pair of glasses I've had since I got them in 7th grade.

Beverage:  Dr Pepper

Deb

Do You See It?

I got the hairs cut on Monday. The bangs had grown enough they were hanging in my face, covering half of my eyes. When I made the decision to get the cut, I was just going to get the bangs done, but the rest of the hair started to bug me, so I had her cut everything.

I feel like a Q-Tip. She said my hair had grown 2 inches from the last cut, which had been right after Thanksgiving. I don't doubt that, but she took more than 2 inches off. It's a bit short for my overall comfort but it's just hair. It will grow out. As she was cutting my hair she said, "I like the lavender color you added. Since you just get a cut here, did you go some place or add it yourself?" I stared at her. I have not colored my hair in nearly 6 years. In fact, here is the blog post from when I decided to stop coloring my hair. Her comment caught me off guard.

"I don't color my hair," I replied.
"Oh," she said. "Interesting. There's a section here that's light purple." She pointed to a section on the back left side of my head. Honestly, I didn't see anything and I kind of felt the fluorescent lights of the shop were playing tricks on her eyes.
Later, however, as she was making sure everything was even, I saw it. It's a small section, but it is a light lavender. How the heck...?

Do you see it? It's a thin stripe toward the back of my head as well as some undertones near the ears. There is also, in this photo, a light yellow stripe. That could be just sunlight. Gray hair has a tendency to go "brassy", it's called; take on yellow overtones. I have noticed that and it makes the hair look dirty, even when its not. I use a shampoo formulated for gray hair which removes this yellow tint and leaves just the gray visible.

I like my gray hair. There are some days when I think, "I should dye it back to my original brown color", but I remember how long it took to grow out and how bad it looked at the end. I was rather happy when it had grown out enough that all the faded brown could be cut off. At this point, I think dying it brown would look fake.

The gray shampoo is a bright royal purple. The gray conditioner is a light lavender. You aren't to use this but once a week because it will dye your hair purple. I only use it when I have to be somewhere and feel there's too much yellow in my hair. I had been out and about with Pam last Saturday, but had used regular shampoo. Plus, I don't wash my hair every day. Increasingly, the science is saying a break from washing is good. I'm in an every other day routine unless I need to make sure it looks good. And then, if I'm not going somewhere over a weekend, I'll just wet it down and leave it, so I can go a Friday morning to Sunday evening without the application of shampoo. That sort of rules out having the shampoo be the culprit in the dye job.

Here it is this morning, in the office.

The lavender color is easier to see. I'm at a loss for how it got there. I didn't use my gray shampoo over the weekend. I didn't think the hair needed it. But that's purple. One of my Internet friends, who changes her color about every 6 weeks, thinks the hair has been absorbing the purple dye for some time. It was hidden in my shaggy growing out cut of before. It will go away, gradually, unless I continue to use the purple shampoo on a weekly basis. In which case, it could get more pronounced. As I have a great body of inspections upcoming, I don't want to be too distinctive.

I kind of like it, now that I see it. It's funky and I'm ready for some funky in my life. I need new glasses, too. No, I'm not getting purple frames.

Beverage:  Raspberry Seltzer

Deb

Totin'

For years, I carried tea bags in my purse. I had a tin, a recycled mint tin, which was the perfect size for those bags. I could keep 3-4 bags in the tin and then, when out to eat or at the office, I'd always have, at hand, the kind of tea I preferred. I lost the tin many years ago and then decided to buy boxes of tea to have in my desk, for a hot mug at work. I hadn't thought about carrying my own, even though I have a small sad when I ask for tea and out comes Lipton.

While some restaurants, mostly upscale, have gone to eclectic brands for their tea, I encounter Lipton in most of the places I go. It's okay, but there is such a wide variety of brands and, maybe it's just me, but English Breakfast in one restaurant can taste just a bit different in another restaurant because they have a different supplier. Orange Pekoe, which is Lipton, is what people in the US grew up on. You just couldn't get anything else. Mercifully, as my tea shelf indicates, that's no longer the case.

There is a huge push for herbal and decaffeinated teas. At the office holiday party last weekend, there was no English Breakfast in the tea box proffered for my selection. I chose Earl Grey, not my favorite, but it was the only dark tea choice I had. I didn't remember, until I was soaking the bag, that I did have another option.

Pam gave me this for Christmas. It holds 2-3 bags, depending upon the size. I currently carry a Huckleberry, an English Breakfast and a Scottish Breakfast. I felt the Earl Grey I had tasted a touch "off". I could have just asked for hot water. That always gets a strange look from servers. But I would have had tea I preferred, rather than tea I had to settle for.

The best thing about this, it fits in my clutch purse. I have my tea whenever I want. Now all I have to do is remember.

Beverage:  hot cocoa

Deb

Harbinger

I've had an issue with Pilchard lately. She's been going into the basement to poop when she wants to register some discontent with the litter boxes. I never know, precisely, what that discontent is and the fact that I don't have to do laundry as often as I used to, thanks to Patt and Pam helping me out in May and June means I don't find the poop for many days.

Over the weekend, I went into the basement to do a load of clothes and saw a dark line by the washer. You need to scrub the area where the cat pees or poops to remove the smell and I was irritated at having yet another spot to clean. I grabbed a paper towel and went to pick up the piece only to find out it wasn't poop. Viola. It was a wooly bear.

I used to see these caterpillars in a lot of places this time of year. It wasn't uncommon to see 4-5 in a week. Now, it's rare to see even one in a year. I chanced across one in Wisconsin while doing an inspection.

I was thrilled to see this one. Having one in my basement is very special. But he wasn't going to survive down there. So I took him outside and put him in the remnants of the pansies. It tickled when he crawled across my hand.

It's interesting that the Wisconsin wooly bear's stripes are roughly the same width, while my wooly bear is distinctly more brown. Folklore would say that the Madison area, where I was doing inspections, is going to have a winter similar to last year while my house will have a mild winter. I've seen projections which say a warmer but snowier winter. Mild, I don't mind. Less heating costs. Snowier? Well, I'm on the fence about that. It would mean more shoveling, something my joints wouldn't appreciate. We'll just have to see.

I wonder if the lack of wooly bears is akin to the lack of monarchs. I'm disappointed that, with all the milkweed I let grow in my yard, I don't have any chrysalises. You'd think, if they can find food, they'd leave their eggs. I try to provide an attractive ecosystem for moths and butterflies even if it makes the yard look unkempt.

Beverage:  English Breakfast tea

Deb

National Day of Gratitude

I follow Christian author Anne Lamott on Facebook. She seems to have this uncanny ability to know when I need a pick me up, in spite of the fact that I'm kind of agnostic about this whole God-thing. My feeling is that he's up there, but there are so many people; some I know personally; who need him way more than me, that he's busy. He just sort of looks in on me occasionally and then goes back to tending the flock of those who are really in need of a faith boost.

Today, when I logged into Facebook, Anne had a picture in her feed. It's National Gratitude Day. Of course her bent was for us to be grateful to have a loving God looking over us. My take is a bit different.

I could spend hours typing the things for which I'm grateful and that list would run into the hundreds or even thousands of items. Today, for instance, when I think about it, I'm grateful for spoons. I'm grateful for the yogurt which needed a spoon to eat. I'm grateful for water and for the bottled water I'm consuming more after having gone through a summer of relying upon soda. I'm grateful for Priority Mail from the post office. I'm grateful for electricity. I'm grateful for Google Maps. (Oooh. Those houses are an hour apart. I can do an inspection and a complaint in a day.) I'm grateful for hand lotion and wonderfully smelling liquid hand soap. I'm grateful for people giving specific directions to their place of business. I'm grateful for gasoline to get me to those places of business. I could go on, but I think you get the idea.

I was, ironically, thinking of this over the weekend. I did laundry and I am grateful to Patt and Pam for giving me, this summer, probably the best gift they have given me, other than their friendship. They did laundry for me. Getting ahead, having nothing that needed to be done in that month while I saved for a new washer has meant the world in terms of quality of life. In August, when I felt like I'd been hit by a truck, the knowledge that I didn't have mountains of laundry to do meant the naps I took when I came home from work were done without guilt. Both of them are so smart. They can see what I need way before I see it. This is but one example.

It's easy to fall into the "oh woe is me" trap. I know this well. When one thing happens, another thing happens and then a third thing happens and it can snowball. It's so very human of us to look at our lives and think we're never going to catch a break rather than what is good about even a bad day. I'm so guilty of that myself. When I pass through those pot holes and come out on the other side, I feel like banging my head on my desk. "You dolt! You didn't practice what you preach. It was never as bad as you made it out to be." Our human nature gets the best of us.

It's good to have a refresher. Every day should be Gratitude Day. I need to remember that every day has something for which to be grateful. I tell those going through a bad piece that it's okay to wallow, to throw yourself a pity party, but only for an hour. Then hoist up your big girl panties, as the aphorism says, and deal with the issue at hand. Plus, remember that you awoke in the morning even if it was to bad news or a slog through a figurative molasses river, uphill, in the winter and barefoot.

So, I am grateful for my family and my friends. I'm grateful for a lot of things, small as well as large. I should be grateful every day and this date reminds me to do that.

Beverage:  Water

Deb

I Don't Know Anyone to Which This Applies

While shopping with Pam at the beginning of August, I needed a couple of cards. I stumbled across this card in the Hallmark section of Kohl's.

It's doubly hilarious to me because I play a dwarf character in World of Warcraft.

I probably shouldn't have laughed so hard, but this is funny. The trouble is, I don't have anyone turning this magical age to send them this card. /sigh  (giggle)

Beverage:  English Breakfast tea

Deb

The Next Project

Having finished Carole's butterfly cross-stitch and left it with her to decide how she wants to frame it, it's time to look ahead to the next project. I'm going to a convention in November; BlizzCon 2015; in Anaheim, California. It's a celebration of all the games Blizzard Entertainment does, but it's kind of akin to mecca for those of us who play World of Warcraft. It's everyone's hope they can go to BlizzCon. I skrimped and saved and, thanks to a friend with impossibly good luck, I got a ticket to go.

I'm going with Faience and Lethia, from my guild. We got a fantastic deal on a hotel room and, while I'm out there, I'll be going to Disneyland. It's just down the street from the convention center so why should I not go? I need to buy airfare and pay for tickets to Disneyland as well as my portion of the hotel. I'm considering a used ipad so I can update my blog and the guild web site with photos. Doing all that on a smartphone drives me nuts so I only check email.

When I decided I could afford a BlizzCon ticket and Lethia decided she could to, I promised, if we got tickets, the three of us, I'd make custom shirts for the convention. On August 1st, Pam and I went to JoAnn Fabrics, to make this plan a reality. I love having her along. We looked through all the patterns. I knew what I wanted but we needed to find the exact pattern. I told her my vision and we dived into the fabric stacks to find the perfect fabric. I need to have her along. So...many...wonderful...fabrics...oh look! "No, that's not what you came here for," she'd say. She is, of course, right. I have boxes and boxes of fabric in the office closet not being used for anything. I need to be reminded of that. I shouldn't say not being used for anything. The girls love to climb on top of the stack and sit there. It's like a hidey hole to them.

Along the way to the perfect fabric, I stumbled upon these gems.

That's a silver metallic in between kelly green stripes. It was quite distinctive but as the basis for a shirt, not so much.

It comes in black and red. As I was looking through the patterns, I chanced upon what I think is a "Game of Thrones" inspired dress that was made with the black version of this. I did seriously consider making us vests, since that would be kind of WOW character like. In the game, your character can wear leather clothing. As appealing as this was, it wasn't what I wanted.

No no and no, but it so reminded me of the curtains in the porch/dining room of the farmhouse where I grew up. The nostalgia washed over me and I thought about my mother making those curtains. They hung in the porch until we moved to town. I know I have some of them in a box somewhere, the fabric useful for quilt pieces.

By now, I'm sure you're detecting a theme here. I stumbled across this.

I just...I have no idea how I would work with this even if it was even remotely attractive. I know retro is in. This certainly bears some resemblance to 1960's fashion and in light seafoam green no less.

Finally, I found it.

It's an Indonesian batik-inspired print. It looks gorgeous in sunlight. I want us to be distinctive but a tee shirt just wasn't going to cut it. I think this will work up beautifully and it's cotton, so it will wash and dry nicely. I came home all excited and then got sick.

I looked at the material sitting on the table and felt so badly that I had no energy. I spent all this money and made this promise. Now that I'm feeling better, my goal has been to clear off the living room table so I can start sewing. I could just move everything there to another space, but that kind of defeats the purpose of cleaning. Baby steps. Baby steps.

Watch this space. I'm excited to execute my idea.

Beverage:  Water

Deb

Framed

Remember the minion poster I had all my guild members sign who attended the meet-up last month?

I finally framed it and put it on the wall. First step was deciding exactly where I wanted it. I have a poster from the "Who Framed Mr. Burns" The Simpsons' episode. It was in TV Guide, back when that was still an extremely popular magazine. A friend kept the poster and gave it to me. It hangs in the hallway in the house above a plaque reading, "Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup." I had considered moving The Simpsons poster to a different wall and putting the minion one in its place. But this is bigger than The Simpsons one and would require a readjustment of the plaque and new holes and an eventual repainting and I didn't want to mess with that.

Then, as I was leaving for work one day, I remembered how I wanted to repaint the back entry.

My kitchen has been yellow since Carole was little. The apples were added a year after the kitchen was painted. I thought one of my goals would be to repaint this space a lighter, brighter yellow, a more Minion yellow. The door frame and the back of the back door would be painted yellow. The ceiling would be painted yellow and I'd paint over the apples and put strategic minions around the space. And the old, very old, cork board, which is really just a catch all for paper junk, would go. Tell me that's inviting. I double-dip dare you. It just looks junky and I never use anything stored on the board. Time to give it away.

So Pam and I found a frame at JoAnn Fabric that I felt would work. It more than worked. Look at the space now.

What a difference a piece of art makes. I almost don't need to repaint the walls as the color complements the poster. I still think I'd like a coat of a lighter yellow just because it would give the space a fresh feeling to it. But there is not the feeling that painting HAS to be done now, you know. I can still paint through October and leave the door open so the space can breathe, if I get better and have my energy back. The cork board went to a local Veteran's group that takes donations. Someone will be happy with it.

Now, whenever I leave the house via the back door, I smile. I will stop and read the names of guild members on the poster. It makes me happy and that's what spaces in your house should do, make you happy.

Beverage:  Water

Deb

"Now is the August of my discontent"

In this soliloquy, which begins Shakespeare's "Richard III", he talks about the reversal of his family's fortunes. "Now is the winter of our discontent" is the exact line. "Winter" in this case, meaning the end of problems. We all know how the play, and the real life Richard the III's, life ended.

It's been a bad month for me. "Discontent" in all it's glorious meaning, is the perfect word to describe this month. So many days have slipped away. So many photos unblogged. There is, however, a reason. I came down with diverticulitis.

On August 1st, I went shopping with Pam. We had a glorious day of laughter and friendship, as we usually do. The next day, I thought I'd eaten something bad. It continued into Monday, August 3rd. I felt like I had the flu. Lots of sleep and on Tuesday, August 4th, I was tired, but I felt reasonably fine. That "reasonably fine" feeling grew ever more tenuous. It seems as if every other day was a bad day. Pain. Excessive tiredness. I felt like my abdomen was full of gas. "If I could just fart, I'd feel better," I would say as a wave of pain overtook me. Finally, self-treating didn't seem to be working and I went to the doctor on August 12th.

I was put on Cipro and Flagyl, two strong antibiotics. One of the problems with an infection is my compromised immune system thanks to the RA. I had to go off all my RA meds and carefully watch when I took my vitamins because they would counteract the Cipro. Unfortunately, one of the side effects of these two antibiotics and going off the RA drugs has been incredible tiredness. I finally gave up trying to remember when I took the Cipro so I could take the vitamins. Even little notes to myself would leave me perplexed. "Why does this say 8:10 and this one say 8:35?" Confusion is a side effect, too. I took to walking around the house with a note pad and pen, writing down what I was trying to remember. This went beyond the "Why did I come into this room?" This was an "I have no idea what I'm doing" memory issue.

Blogging was impossible. I tried, oh how I tried. There are a large number of photos to talk about. A month of photos has come and gone without a comment. I have missed me.

It took 5 days for the pain to subside. I've been off both drugs now since Saturday. I'm still tired, but I know that to be the cost of RA. I'm having twinges of pain in joints that were pain-free just a month ago. Heck, I was reveling in being pain-free. I need to mow the lawn now, after a month of not needing to do it. The idea now scares me. It won't be a 45 minute exercise. I may not be able to do it in one day. I feel I've been sent to jail and I have no "Get out free" card.

Through all of this, I've kept working. The pain wasn't so bad during the day that it interfered with work. It only got bad when I went home at night. I have been lectured about taking time for me. Perhaps I should have. I guess I'm of the mind-set that sick days are for when you're really sick and I wasn't into what I'd call "really sick" state. I did think I'd take this or that day off and then work would get crazy and I'd feel that I'd really inconvenience the office if I called off, so I didn't.

Depression set in. I have stuff all over my house, piles of stuff. I deal with a little bit but I wear out so quickly, that things don't get done and the knowledge that, just last month, none of this wouldn't be put away, mocks me. Even though part of learning to live with RA involves breaking tasks down into smaller, more manageable pieces, when I can't clean all the litter boxes because just doing one leaves me tired, that's minute pieces and even though that's what I should be doing, it depresses me when I can't do more without pain (because I'm off my RA meds) or getting overly tired.

There is a silver lining in all of this. My rheumatologist wants to change my RA medication. She feels the Humira was not stopping the progression of the disease. I measure progression by days without pain and I had a handful in July, before the diverticulitis. She measures it in a different way. So, having to go off all RA meds is good for her because we can go back to tweaking them. She wants to start me on Orencia, another injectable biologic drug. Unlike Enbrel and Humira, it's used only for RA. We're going to see if that helps. I'm not noticing any deformities in joints and, prior to getting sick, I could do a lot of things I hadn't considered before. I have another appointment for the diverticulitis on September 2nd and we'll go from there.

All of this has worn me down. I'm not eating properly or drinking adequate amounts of water. Pam had to come to my "rescue" and get me to Target to buy groceries so I would have things in the house I'd actually eat. Soup is my friend, but there are days when even that looks unappealing. I know this is a side effect and part of my brain says, "You need to eat." But the louder part says, "Shut up. She's tired. Go ahead. Sleep in the recliner." And, lately, that sleep in the recliner has involved a cat scan.

It's kind of hard to see her, but she loves to stretch out in my lap. When we sit, we can sit for upwards of 2 hours. If only the purrs of a cat would cure what ails me. Mija will often jump up next to me and demand ear scratches. With the two of them next to me, I can almost forget this set back.

It feels like I'm going up hill through molasses. I keep telling myself that the aches and pains are old familiar territory. I'm not nearly as bad as I was in 2012, when I first saw Dr. Francis and, once we get the infection cured, I'll be back on the drugs that help with the pain. Things will be back to "normal", or what passes for normal. It's just getting there that is the depressing part.

Beverage:  Water

Deb

Words

Every year since 1980, I have purchased the "365 Word-a-day Calendar". Some words, when I rip off the new day, I know. Some I'll never add to my vocabulary and some have found their way into my lingo. Some words have special meaning. I saved them. I found three when I was cleaning in the basement in preparation for a new washer.

Thankfully, I wrote on the page what happened so, when I cleaned years in the future, I could remember exactly why I saved that word from that date.

This was the last day Carole lived in Wheaton. Since this date, she's lived in Connecticut before moving to her current, and final, home in Virginia. We didn't have any kind of religious ceremony, but I do remember crying while sitting on the front steps watching her drive away knowing that this was a necessary part of raising a child. You give them wings and trust they paid attention to some of your instructions on how to use them.

Here are two more which also elicited tears. This word seemed particularly poignant on this date.

Penney was a gray cat we adopted in 1992, I believe. Kidney disease made her waste away and I finally couldn't stand watching her try to walk to the bathroom to get a drink of water. Pam drove me to the emergency vet my vet recommended and I said, "Goodbye". Even though it's one of the kindest things you can do when a beloved pet is suffering, it's still a heartbreak. That day, the world went haywire.

Finally, there is this word.

2007 didn't start out very positive.

Anne was my English pen-pal. We had known each other 35 years at this point. We were the best of friends and confidants. We went through first crushes, high school, college, engagements and marriages. My ex-husband and I flew to England in 1982, while I was pregnant, to attend Anne's wedding. We had children within a month of each other. She had twin girls. We went back in 1996 so our children could meet. She was with me when my marriage crumbled and when Carole and I were on our own. We went through the raising of children and their lives.

Then liver cancer struck. She was diagnosed in 2004 but seemed to have it beaten to the point that, in April of 2005, I met Anne, her husband, Graham, and son, James, at Walt Disney World for a week of fun. She looked so healthy. We had a fantastic time.

But the cancer returned in early 2006. She never told me how bad it was. Her Christmas letter was filled with news about the family. We always talked at New Year's. She would call me at the stroke of midnight and hold up the phone to the TV so I could hear Big Ben ringing in the new year from England. She did the same thing as 2006 turned to 2007. She never told me she had been in bed since 5 that evening and had to be helped up to call me at midnight. She wrote a short, one-page letter, "from the couch in the living room, by the fire" as they called the gas furnace, in early January. I never heard from her again.

One of her daughters called me the above evening to tell me she had passed in her sleep. Her husband, Graham, had contacted me at the end of January, after receiving my reply to her early January letter. He realized she had not told me, in an effort to spare me worrying, how sick she was and that hospice had been arranged. They were just waiting. I have to admit that every phone call from January 28th onward brought dread. In a way, it was kind of a relief knowing she was not suffering and not trying to keep the British "stiff upper lip" anymore. Graham said he never told her that I knew what was going on.

I looked at these words as I paged through a stack of papers, invitations, mementos which were on a shelf. At the time, it was important to save these. Now, I have reached the point where I can let them go and be, simply, words of the day. I don't save words that have a special event occurring on that date anymore. I unconsciously decided they were just words. I miss Carole. I miss Penney. I miss Anne. Time has moved on but the memories stay with me in my heart where they belong.

Beverage:  Dunkin' Donuts tea

Deb

Friendship Means

"Bring all your laundry with you when you come," Patt emailed.

My response? "What?" I swear the lady is crazy. Bring ALL my laundry?

"Yes, bring all the sheets, blankets, rugs, clothing you have to wash. Bring it all when you come visit. We can hang it out on my lines or, if the weather is bad, dry it in my dryer."

I thought that was a huge, huge imposition upon a friend, even one I've known for 27 years. But Patt was insistent. I wasn't going to bring my laundry. Nevermind that my washer is dying and will need to be replaced soon. I can do small loads and it will all get done, eventually. Nope. Nope. Patt kindly ordered me to bring all of it. I hesitated until my friend, Pam, said, "That is a wonderful offer. Such a kind friend." She remembered having friends offer the use of their washers when she was a brand new military wife living in the "wonderful" military married housing. It's funny, but Pam's indirect blessing caused me to stuff my laundry into garbage bags and haul it to Minnesota.

Everything went; all the bedding, all the blankets, all the rugs, all the pants and shirts, all of it. We washed it. We dried it. I should have taken a photo of Patt's lint trap after drying some of the rugs in the dryer. They had been out on the line but it rained so we used the dryer. I have a black cat. She sheds. I'm pretty sure half a cat was stuck to the lint trap. We pulled towels out of the washer and all these little pills of black fur fell out. We had a great laugh.

Patt's purpose in asking for my laundry was to ease the going up and down of the basement stairs. If everything was done, if I didn't have to go up and down the stairs every day, that would help with my sciatica and my RA. I came home and put it all away. It was such a great feeling to know I was caught up on my laundry.

It wasn't quite enough to make it through the month, so I have done a couple small loads. Then the rains came. I got close to 3 1/2 inches and that amount of water will cause seepage in some places between the wall and the floor of the basement. When I went to bed, there was nothing on the floor. In the morning, there was water. A pile of pants and a pile of shirts was soaked. Hearing this, Pam immediately offered her washer and dryer so I could do both loads and not in little batches. Plus, with the basement drying out, any wash hung on my lines is doing to take twice as long.

I figure there will be sales over the July 4th holiday. What better way to celebrate our nation's independence than by having appliances go on sale. I'll be ready. I don't know if I can stretch the clean clothes without using my washer a couple more times. I'm going to try. Pam said, if it gets to the end of the month and I'm really low on clothes, just let her know.

This is friendship. "Bring all your laundry with you when you come."

Beverage:  Raspberry seltzer water

Deb

There Was a Wedding - Part 1 - Getting There

On Saturday, March 21st, Carole and Larry married. It was a glorious event. In contrast to the previous wedding Carole was a part of, this one was more relaxed, much more fun, a celebration in the truest sense of the word.

Step one of the process was actually getting to Virginia. My mother was able to come along. At first she said she couldn't, but my sister and I did an "end around", so to speak and arranged things with her husband's children to check in on him so she could come. Then, my niece was going to drive her as far as Clinton, Iowa, where I'd meet her so she wouldn't be driving the 5 hours on her own. But that plan fell through. So, mom just hopped in her car and drove herself, taking all the time she needed to make it here.

I rented a car as I have done the last few times I've gone to Carole's. It's so much nicer to rent than bounce out there in the Jeep. This time, I got a Chrysler 200. The dash board looked like the controls of an airplane.

I don't think I'd take this style of car again.

We never did figure out what all the buttons did, plus, it did not come with a CD player. You were to hook up your cell phone to the radio to play your music. As someone who does not have music on her cell phone, this is not a plus for the car. I neglected to take a full photo of the car. It was roomy and comfortable, but the lack of either satellite radio or a CD player made this a "thumb's down". There were a couple good things. The gas mileage was very good which cut the cost of the trip and it had push button start. That took a bit of getting used to but it was nice.

We headed east at 6 a.m. into a cloudy sunrise. Traffic eastbound on Interstate 80 slowed to a stop and we sat and we sat and we sat. There had been one of those rear ender accidents involving 3 cars, one of which was heavily damaged. Of course, people had to slow down to look. While this was being cleared, 5 cars tagged each other so that effectively closed the Interstate for about 20 minutes while vehicles were moved to the side and police could come and sort things out. We met all of this as it was slowly unpacking itself, but we spent a good 30 minutes going 3 miles.

Once away from the Chicagoland area and into Indiana, the sun came up and we had a nice drive.

Ohio is the worst part. Perhaps that's why they have the best restroom and eating facilities. The road is flat and there's not a lot of "scenery" until you get to the eastern quarter of the state. Pennsylvania goes by fast because it's hilly. Then, in quick succession, you go through Maryland, a bit of West Virginia and you're into Virginia. Slowly, the Blue Ridge Mountains start showing up.

We have to go over this thin line of mountains and through part of the Shenandoah Valley to get to our destination. By this time, the sun is low on the horizon.

Twelve hours after we started, we pulled into the driveway. I've done this drive 4 times now. The best thing I ever did was listen to Pam and rent a car. If I can have my tunes with me, the time goes by fairly rapidly.

So we have arrived. The next day is the rehearsal and one more thing sandwiched into a jam packed weekend.

Beverage:  Water

Deb

Clean Up in Aisle 1

The thing about my traveling is the effect it has on the girls. It's stressful for them, no matter what I do to make it calm. For a big trip, like the wedding, I haul the suitcase up a week in advance and leave it out, tossing in things a bit every day. I read that this provides visual cues that change is coming, that I'm going to be going some place and won't be home. For overnight or a couple of days away stay, I pack the night before. It's probably as much stress when it's an overnight as it is when it's a week as cats really don't have a concept of time. "I'll be back on Sunday," means I'm gone as long as "I'll be back next Tuesday". Add to this the need to have someone look in on them. Although they love Pam, now that they know her, she couldn't stop in on the last trip and I had to hire a service. Rob is great and I have no worries, but the girls don't know him yet and are scared. He never sees them when he stops by to fill dishes.

So there were back-to-back trips last month. And there were day trips for work which necessitated my leaving the house by 6:45 and not returning before 6:45 p.m. Even if I was home, I wasn't "home". I was tired and not able to relate to them as I usually did.

I came home from my mother's birthday celebration and unpacked the car. I started to look through the mail on the table in the living room and Mija went to jump up onto that table to command my attention. Also on the table is my sewing box. She hit the box and both her and the box tumbled to the floor.

She was terrified and took off. It was a good 2 hours before she came out from under the cedar chest in the office to see if I was furious with her. I was worried it had fallen on her but she was okay.

It's a mess. And you know what, it's still on the floor. I look at it and think, "When I clean this up, I need to really clean it. I probably have stuff that I don't need anymore (like 3 pair of sewing scissors)." Plus, I don't know if the box top just popped off or if it broke at the hinges. If it broke, then the box is no good. I'm pretty sure my parents gave me this some 45 years ago, back when I was sewing up a storm at home. I did scrape the stuff that rolled under the recliner over to the pile.

I don't have the desire to clean it up. This weekend, I tackled the papers in my home office. How could I underpay the Internet bill by 4 cents? Seriously. I did wash. I stripped the bed. All the dishes are done. I read another chapter in, of all things, the book I'm reading about tidying. When I go out the front door, I have to step over the mess, but clean it up? I just don't feel like it.

I'm chalking it up the the general tiredness I'm working through. Pieces of life are getting sorted out and I just haven't, mentally, reached this point in the journey. The girls aren't chasing spools of thread under the recliner so there's not a reason to clear the pile. Check back next weekend. Maybe I'll have done it then.

Beverage:  English Breakfast tea

Deb

$2.99

I'm just going to leave this right here, so to speak.

Pam went into the kitchen store at the mall and I followed. For two dollars and ninety-nine cents, you tell me how I was to resist. I washed it but I haven't used it, yet. I'm thinking this is a for pancakes. There's an apple oatmeal pancake I've had a hankering to make, but the oatmeal has to sit overnight. It's not a recipe one makes when one gets up with 45 minutes to be out the door and to the office.

Beverage:  Dr Pepper

Deb

Comfort

I went shopping with Pam this weekend for the final piece to my wedding ensemble. Once that was obtained, we wandered about this great outlet mall west of us.

I hadn't been here in a number of years. Some of the stores had moved from where my admittedly faulty memory remembered them. Thank goodness Pam was around to map out the places we wanted to visit.

It's an outdoor mall with covered areas in some wings. It's also expanding and will have a lot more stores open by August. We got there right after stores opened. By the time we were leaving, people were circling the parking lot looking for spots. We were quite amazed. They need better parking, but if we went there again, we're the kind of people who would get there at or before opening time to make sure we had close parking.

Anyway, after buying the last piece I needed, we wandered about. One of the stops we made was at the Clarks shoe store. The last time I was here, I bought a pair of Clarks and I was in the market for another pair. This is going to sound like a commercial for Clarks but I like the brand so much, I want to tell you about this.

I need another pair of shoes for work when I am on my feet doing inspections. I need something reasonably lightweight because I don't need to be really tired because I'm dragging a pair of work boots around.

I need sturdy, too. Stylish comes way down on the list, after affordability. That's why I liked going to the outlet. I regularly price Clarks shoes and know what they start at regular retail price. I can wear last year's styles. I don't care. This pair won.

I had foot problems years ago and the podiatrist I saw recommended Clark shoes. My rheumatologist has said Clarks have great fit and support. These shoes were billed as a help for people with foot problems. That kind of sold me on them to even try them on.

The other thing I liked was the tread. We tend to go into places, like basements, which have accumulated dirt or be outside in mud or snow, where having treads on the sole provides me with that much more stability. In the snow of a Monday morning, they were perfect.

Clarks are expensive. That is without question. I really can't afford them when they are on sale. I had to put the wedding shoes into the budget and cut something else, even though they were on sale, in order to get them. But I will wear the crap out of these. I'm still wearing Clarks which are 10 years old. They gave me a free shoe horn too. I've found that sliding into some of my shoes has become a bit tougher in recent years.

Perhaps the best part of the deal, the box.

Beverage:  English Teatime tea

Deb