Wishing Upon Stars

For those of us in certain income brackets, issues which need money thrown at them seem to crop up in clusters. I'm going through one right now and it has me frustrated. Bear with me while I, more or less, vent.

I made a decision last year to celebrate my World of Warcraft guild's 10th anniversary at Disney World with a bunch of guild mates. I made a budget to enable saving for that event only to have said budget blow apart by the sewer backing up at the same time the blower on the furnace decided to work only 50% of the time. I am grateful I had some kind of savings to fix both problems, but those emergencies set me way back. I redid the budget and worried that I would need to cut way to the bone, once again, in order to make this trip, on which I had placed a deposit back in September, a reality.

An acquaintance, who is even less of an acquaintance after this, (She's a friend of a friend so I can legitimately avoid her.) was at a lunch with my friend who inquired as to the state of my sewer. Gotta admit, "Can you flush your toilet now without it backing up into the basement?" is lovely lunch conversation. I mentioned getting both things fixed but having to use my Disney fund for this. This woman, whom I have met twice before, and I can tell you where I was, such was the impression she made, said, "Seriously, you're bitching about having to use savings for Disney to fix house problems? Do you know how many people can't even dream about going to Disney and you're bitching about having a 'set back'?" and she made those air quotes when she said "set back".

I pride myself on not letting things get to me. Life hasn't been kind but I've learned to roll with the punches. If I get called out on something, I look at the comment to see if there is any truth to what they are saying.

I've put money down on this. It means a great deal to me. I know there are people, probably in my neighborhood, who struggle for mac and cheese on a Tuesday night and hold no illusions about getting anywhere near the mouse house. But this is my life and my money and her comment reeks of jealousy and self-righteousness. As I type this, I can see the glare in her eye as she looked at me. My friend said, "Yeah, it sucks when you're saving for something and emergencies strike." The woman muttered, "Heh. Disney is not an emergency."

Fast forward to February. if I could, I would be just like Ned Flanders in "The Trouble With Trillions" episode.

If it were possible to get all the paperwork I need AND have the IRS accept returns early, I'd be doing my taxes on New Year's Day. My feeling is if I get a refund, I want it now. If I owe money, I need to know so I can save and send it in on time. But, institutions are terrible, it seems to me, about sending out financial forms so I don't always have everything until the end of January. Therefore, it's about mid-February when I sit down to do the deed. This year, I got enough back to pay for the bulk of my October Disney trip. I stuffed that straight into the savings account. "I'm not going to touch that," I told myself. "That's for Disney." Or so I thought.

Enter life.

A year ago, I got new glasses with my tax refund.

I had an eye doctor appointment in early February. It's a yearly thing now because of my RA. I have RA-induced rosacea of the eye. It just means my eyes are prone to drying out, which makes them itchy and red. Then the cornea can get scratched more easily. I'm to use artificial tears four times a day. I'm not very good on the remembering to do that part. It's a rare day when I put in drops four times. Usually I remember three times.

Anyway, I noticed, in December, my eyesight had deteriorated just a bit. Some things, particularly in the distance, are blurry or have a blurred edge to them. This was verified in the eye exam so I need new glasses. This will be the third year in a row my prescription has changed. I may have to get used to the idea this is my reality; a minor change every year.

So, I set out to find new glasses. It's a racket. I've purchased glasses online from Coastal.com for the last 3 years. I was able to get good deals, but I dislike the frames Coastal has this year, plus, they are more expensive. Wandered over to another place, Zenni Optical. Their prices were better than Coastal but their frames were no better looking. Then I found a place called Glasses USA.

Here I found a couple pair I liked and, initially, their prices looked very good. Then you get into actually purchasing glasses and their "Glasses $95 including lenses" goes down the tube. I have to get bifocals, which cost more. When a company says, "Glasses $95 including lenses", that's what I expect to pay with additions like tax and shipping. They offered a 50-65% discount but that was only on frames and didn't apply if you picked a frame on sale. The costs kept adding up until I was way over what I wanted to pay for glasses. They have a 3-month payment plan, but they put a hold on your funds for the full amount. That's not a payment plan. So, I told them I was severely disappointed in all the wording on their site and will be taking my business elsewhere. They have told me to call them because they have a "deal" for me. No thanks.

But the big kicker is the lack of liquid funds to even get glasses. Oh sure, I have Disney money. I could easily afford glasses IF I pillaged my Disney fund. There is another online glasses company, Warby Parker, who advertises more realistically, "Glasses FROM x". But they are much more expensive and I really cannot afford $345 for glasses unless I take the money from my Disney account. The back door needs to be fixed. I have to get it working again. I don't see that as a small repair. I can fund that, again, IF I take money from my Disney account.

Another acquaintance, more sympathetic to this frustration, said, "You have 6 months before you have to hand over the rest of the money for the vacation. You should be able to save what you take out in 6 months." The operative word there is 'should'. While I have the vacation paid for, I want spending money and money for, frankly, impulse purchases. As I did when I went to BlizzCon and Disneyland in 2015, I want to do Christmas shopping. My tax return wasn't enough to cover those things. I still need to save and it's hard to save when life throws these things at you.

Then, I find out, at the beginning of this month, one of my late English pen pal's daughters and her family, are coming to Florida for two weeks; Disney World and Universal. I have not seen Elizabeth since 1996. She's married with two kids of her own. Her dad and brother are coming and I last saw them in 2005. "You're welcome to come to our villa and stay for a few days. It would be wonderful to see you and we have an extra room," she said.

Oh dear. If I plunder the Disney fund, I can go. I have the vacation days. I wouldn't go for more than a down, hang out, back weekend. But if I take money for this from the fund, where does it stop? This is not, by any stretch, an emergency. Yet, they are so close. I'd need airfare and a car and money for food. I'm content with not going to either Disney and Universal and just hanging around the villa. When Anne died, we kind of lost touch with each other. What a unique opportunity to reconnect, and yet...

Those words above, from a woman I don't like, rankle me, stick in my craw, so to speak. I know there are people much less off than me. Part of my refund went to charities I feel strongly about. This whole glasses thing has me looking ahead. Every year, I fear, I'm going to be in this position of needing new glasses and not finding anything which fits my budget. I'm not looking at frame which cost $170, either. I find those to be ugly, frankly. I also haven't posted my door problem to a site called "Thumbtack" where companies and handymen can give you an estimate on what they think it will cost to do what you want done. Maybe I'm way overestimating what I think fixing the door will cost. I could be pleasantly surprised.

This is merely a post expressing frustration at life and how it seems to gang up on us. I'm going to make do with my glasses for right now. I have no desire to call Glasses USA. If they want my business, they will tell me in writing, what kind of discount they are offering. Otherwise, at the end of the month, I'll schlep myself out to glasses stores and have a look. It may not yield anything, but at least I've given it a go. I want to see Elizabeth, Graham and James and Elizabeth's husband and kids. But that trip feels very much like a "lottery trip" where only some unexpected windfall is going to make it happen because I'm so resistant to using my Disney funds. And then a wave of sadness comes over me and I wonder if I'm being incredibly selfish.

I never count on a windfall. I never counted on getting a tax refund which paid for the basic trip. I don't count on having work trips where I'd get mileage which could be applied somewhere. I count only on what I make every month and that has to work to make what I need a reality. Anything else is unexpected. I just wish life wasn't, sometimes, a need to throw money at things to make it better. It gets down-heartening.

Beverage:  Irish Breakfast tea

Deb

Spectacles

I saw my eye doctor back in October, two weeks before BlizzCon. There was a slight change in my prescription which would necessitate new glasses. I really like Coastal.com so called them to see about glasses. It was determined that I probably wouldn't get new glasses before leaving for California and I really didn't want them to come while I was gone, even though Pam was picking up the mail. I would order new glasses when I came back. In hindsight (isn't that generally the truth), I should have ordered glasses and had them waiting for me because I got busy and then I had other expenses and it was the receipt of my tax refund which spurred me to finally buy that new pair with the new prescription. It was time.

Here is the old pair.

In this light, the frames look black, but they were a dark navy blue. I liked them the first 6 months after getting them, but, since December, I had a problem with them sliding down my nose, even if I didn't bend over. I probably wouldn't have considered new glasses even with a tax refund if they hadn't been problematic. There's nothing you can do with plastic frames, about nose slide. They are formulated for a specific measurement.

With this problem in mind, I searched the Coastal site and found these.

I've gone back to a wire frame. The gal who helped me at Coastal said there is much more room to adjust the fit with wire frames than with plastic. I can adjust the nose pads and bend the glasses slightly to fit an odd size.

I went with a more pronounced blue and it's sparkly! I like the bigger lens size. Coastal was having a 50% off sale on lenses when I ordered. That's where eyeglass manufacturers get you. A $29 frame is nothing if you have to put no-line bifocals in them.

There's been a bit of an adjustment. I still take them off when I read or when I do cross-stitch. Sometimes, things are blurry in the distance, if I look through the bottom of the lens and not the top. It's about unlearning habits because the glasses I had were out of focus for me.

I expect this is what my life is going to be like going forward. There may, or may not, be an incremental shift in my sight and I'll need to get glasses roughly every year or 18 months. Dr. Park was very happy with my eyes, saying there is no sign of any RA complications affecting my sight. Any incremental shifts are simply age-related. Ah yes, age. I've been on this earth for a few years. Some day, when I'm bored, I should try to figure out how many pair of glasses I've had since I got them in 7th grade.

Beverage:  Dr Pepper

Deb

Tidying Begins

I haven't finished the whole book, The Art of Tidying, but I'm far enough along that I can start to see the bigger picture. There are things I disagree with, which I will enumerate when I provide a review of the book when I'm finished, but, for now, I'm motivated to work through the clothing.

She says to collect all the clothes, every last piece and dump it all into a pile on the floor. Then, you slowly go through the pile, handling each piece and asking yourself if it really is something you'll wear. If I did that, the pile would be there for weeks. I understand the value of doing a program as it's intended, but I have to be realistic about just how much energy I have versus what I'm trying to get done. So, I'm going through the closet.

This side has the work short-sleeved shirts, sweaters and pajamas. I realize that I can move the pjs to a drawer. The sweaters I wear and I have 4 of them. That just leaves the shirts. I pulled 3 white shirts from the closet yesterday. They are "women's cut" which only works if you are a size 2. I could use a white polo shirt but I'm going to make a list of things I could use and then buy them as I have funds and find them on sale.

I looked through my "Hawaiian-style" shirts. I need to try on all of the ones I have and make peace with giving away the ones that don't fit. I have a pattern to make the style of shirt I love so I could do that. I also have a number of hunks of splashy fabric which could be turned into shirts. Pondering this; pondering.

When I remove things from the closet, I stick them in grocery bags. The pile is getting a bit large.

One of the veteran's groups called on Thursday and the gal seemed surprised that I had stuff. It has to be a thankless job, to call lists of people and ask if they have any clothing or household goods for donation. I haven't lately so I tend to ignore the call when I see it come on my caller ID. Perhaps her surprise came from a "yes" after she had had a string of "no's". She was very happy I have stuff.

When it comes time to put this out for pick up, I'll be moving it to a garbage bag for ease of carry. I should make a list of everything donated. In the past, you could just assign an arbitrary monetary amount to your donation and then write it off on your taxes. You can't do that anymore. Because I intend to donate as I clean, I'll need to keep records for next year. I anticipate many more bags going out between now and the end of fall, at least, in my mind's eye, I think there will be.

So, it begins. I have some vintage clothing I'd like to sell as well as my wedding dress. I could probably sell the dress on eBay, but I need a dressmaker's form to take decent photos of it. It feels odd to be looking forward to getting that out of my house. I have no clue how long the motivation will last but I'm going to ride the wave as long as I can. It can only make my life more satisfying to be rid of things I never use.

Beverage:  miscellaneous tea

Deb

How to Trap A Cat, or Two

It's that time of year when the papers fly and you dread the application of time and math skills or your lack thereof. It's tax time. The last piece of major paper I needed arrived on Saturday so I spent last night sorting papers into piles to make sure I have all my documentation to do taxes this weekend. I use Tax Act which I found to be easier for me to process than TurboTax. Both still require that I have everything in order before I sit down. I have a tendency to use the "piling" system instead of a "filing system" which means I have to sort and then file the ream of paper generated from the last time I filed everything.

I was rather proud of myself. Although it appeared to be a huge pile, once sorted into the various categories, it didn't turn out to be that much, at least in comparison to some years. I also found a couple of pieces of paper I need for other things and discovered I could recycle some papers I no longer need to keep. The actual act of pitching stuff into the recycling bin is very cathartic.

I went to make tea to have as I actually filed stuff, not piled it back where it came from. When I returned to the bedroom, I found this.

Put out paper of any sort and you've got an instant cat trap. They've been rather argumentative with each other lately. I'm not sure why. There have been some rather nasty growling and hissing episodes of late so to see them resting calmly in proximity to each other is gratifying. I can file this stuff later.

Beverage:  Dr Pepper

Deb

Life, Version 10.8

I get teased, a lot, about my devotion to Apple products. Now, I don't own an iPhone. I have Android because that's what my company approved. I don't have an iPad. I've used my friend, Perry's, and if I won one or had someone give one to me, I'd probably use it, but it's not something I feel is vital to my existence. I'm more than connected enough.

But, after the great hard drive crash of December 2012 and the lines that were appearing in my computer screen, I realized I needed to replace my computer. At six, going on seven years of age, it was easily 150 in human years and was simply wearing out. I don't watch TV. I don't have cable. I play World of Warcraft. That's my pastime and a new computer will make the pastime more enjoyable.

When the tax refund was deposited in the bank account, I searched for the best computer deal for me. I don't need a lot of the bells and whistles found on some models. I don't do web site development. I don't compose music. I don't create graphics. I play a computer game. I write letters and I maintain this blog. So a lot of the programs and capabilities of certain computers won't even be touched by me. Why pay for them? I'd really like a CD/DvD drive so I don't have to buy an external one. iTunes does not have even a fifth of my jazz library. I want to be able to upload my music. I need to be able to upload photos from my camera. This really is what I use my computer for and anything else is superfluous to my life.

With the help of Matt, Jon and Chris, I found one. I had it delivered to the office because it required a signature and it would not sit on the front steps even if the UPS guy got a neighbor to sign for it. The UPS guy for our office has been coming here for at least 5 years. We love him to pieces. He's really good. I mentioned the computer was coming. Last Thursday, he stuck his head into my office and said, "Oh darn. No one is here. I guess I'll just have to take this home with me for safe keeping."

I practically tackled him in the hallway.

This new computer is 21 inches wide. I kind of wanted a lap top. I could load the game onto that and then take it wherever I was going. But you pay for that portability and, particularly with Apple, what I could afford was not really an upgrade to the screen size on which I play the game. That's a big consideration. So, I went with a desktop model. I also got a refurbished rather than brand new computer. I still have the same warranty since I purchased this from Apple.

It was a bit gangly getting it home.

For a minute, I didn't think it would fit in the Jeep.

Then, as I was driving the 2.5 miles home, I found myself saying, "I have my new computer here. Get out of the way." Funny how you'll tolerate some kinds of driving when it's just you and your lunch but add a thousand dollar piece of equipment and everyone's out to get you.

There was a guild event that night so I left the machine in the box in the living room. Chris had volunteered to help me get it set up and running and to teach me about some of the new things you can do with the new to me operating system (OS). This is rather important. Apple names their operating systems after cats. I had updated my OS about 4 years ago from "Leopard", which the computer had come with, to "Snow Leopard". "Mountain Lion", the newest version, was released last July. (I'm waiting for the "Domestic American Shorthair" version.) I need to learn what to do with this new OS. It's not like going from a word-based OS to the familiar icon-based OS, but the things I did, out of habit, probably won't be the same and I will have quite a few "where is..." moments. I felt setting things up was a task best left for the weekend. The box was 2 inches taller than the seat for the recliner.

My guild mates couldn't believe my restraint. "How can you not want to open it?" Chris convinced me to get going on the system migration. "The sooner you start, the sooner you can play," he said in that teasing voice when someone it holding the carrot just out of range. "Okay, fine."

Apple computers are ridiculously easy to set up. Step 1:  Open the box.

Step 2:  Prepare the space where the old computer will sit while you migrate everything to the new computer.

This was quite the job. Look at the dust. This is where the printer, that hasn't worked in 2 years, sat. It's going bye-bye when Wheaton has it's annual electronics turn in during April. I would like a new printer/scanner. I would write more letters if I could write and print them at home.

Step 3:  Move the old computer and put the new one in the old one's place.

Be sure to use the word, "Whoa" a lot during this process. At the time I was doing this, Chris had taken over my old computer and was reconfiguring my router for wireless connections.

Step 4:  Find the mouse, keyboard and power cables. Remove the cushion around the new computer and plug it into power. Remember to say, "Whoa" at least a half dozen times. Have a cat come find out what you're doing while you are under the desk trying to figure out if you really need all the power cords that are plugged into your multi-cord adapter.

Step 5: Turn the thing on and gasp at the sheer size of your screen now.

From this point, we started the data transfer process.

I remember doing that when I bought the one on the left. All my settings, folders, photos and World of Warcraft would be transferred, we hoped wirelessly, from left to right. Then, it would be a matter of sorting out what I needed and didn't need and migrating that to the new operating system.

In practice, it didn't work as seamlessly as we had hoped. I awakened on Friday to the same message that I had gone to bed with and that message was still on the screen when I got home from work on Friday. Chris determined that the computer on the left had gone to sleep during the overnight attempt to transfer data and this stopped the transfer but there isn't a way to tell me that. Thanks to my pack rat tendencies, I had another Ethernet cable and we hooked the two together. Transfer of all data took 45 minutes. Then, I could begin the weeding out of the stuff I really don't need. I've spent all weekend doing that and asking questions about where things go and how do I do what I used to do. Chris has been so patient with me.

It's been utterly amazing to work on this. The things I use most have been updated and will, eventually, become intuitive. I've learned so much in 3 days. I updated my web browser. Might as well do that. I'm taking a critical look at the things I had on the old system. For instance, I really don't use the address book or the calendar. As long as there is a calendar behind the computer, I simply need the time in the upper right corner.

For now, I'm keeping the old computer. I don't have an extended keyboard with the new one, but I really like the touch of it as compared to my old keyboard. The new machine came with a wireless mouse, but I couldn't figure out how to make it work properly in the game so we hooked up my Logitech mouse. The old Apple mice I have kicking around can go into the great bag of miscellaneous cables which will be recycled in April. I have no need of them anymore, not even as a back up.

I need to take a screenshot in the game. I found some places where I took screenshots on the old machine. You need to see what I can see now. It's a brand new game for me. I was with 2 guild members in a 5-man event last night. We ran through a building and out onto its patio. "Oh my gosh! It's snowing out here!" I had never seen the snowfall. My graphics had to be kept low so the game would run. I'm seeing distances and things I just never saw. I was happy with how the game played and looked; obviously because I am still playing it after 7 years. I just never saw some things because my computer couldn't handle it.

So, as Jon says, "Welcome to the 21st century." It's going to take me a few weeks to get back up to speed and to discover all the things I can do with this new system. You know how, sometimes, you just know you bought the right thing? This is it.

Here's to 6 more years of gaming.

Beverage:  water

Deb

That's All

This short month often leaves me feeling monetarily anxious. Never you mind that it's only short by a couple of days, those days represent money and dates when things could be due but aren't because those days aren't there. So, everything comes at once instead of spread out. March 1st looming on the horizon with nothing but change in the pocket has often left me with a case of the "how can I's", as in "how can I possibly pay this"?

My refunds from both state and federal taxes have gone a ways to make me feel a bit more secure. There are still bills that have to be wrangled and negotiated every month and I've added medical expenses to the list, but I am calmer about squeezing every last dime out of the paycheck and shoving it where it needs to go.

Sometimes, when I get a month behind and don't have a current bill in front of me, I'll estimate what the next charges will be and send that amount. It can be a crap shoot, a game of guessing. I've found that calling the company and asking for current charges often gets me an amount that shows a payment hasn't been applied, yet. So, it was taken out of my account on the 22nd and it's the 30th and it's still not applied? Huh? "Well, ma'am, billing has probably applied it, but it's not showing up on your account here in customer service." Whatever. I'm usually very close when estimating so I'm not that worried.

I had a bill this month that comes usually on or around the 8th. I'd been a bit behind with this account but they understood the need to pay the medical bill first. I would get caught up over time. This month's bill should be small and then we would be back to normal in March. I couldn't have predicted this.

That's what I owed them. Fifty cents.

I thought about sending a check. I thought about not paying it this month and letting it roll over into next month, but there would be finance charges, however small, on that fifty cents. I figured a check would cost more than fifty cents to process so, let's just send them the cash. I taped the quarters to the front of the bill and off it went.

As I look through the finances and contemplate another high gas bill to heat the house, sending off fifty cents to be current makes me feel really good. Wish all my bills were like that.

Beverage:  Rooibos tea

Deb

Days Off

Tomorrow is a work day. While that might seem like an unsurprising statement, I have been off since Wednesday. It's been a productive 5 days for me.

Wednesday was rainy, pretty much all day, until the temperatures plummeted. It was 41 at noon and 15 by 10 p.m. I am terribly aware of the furnace running and running and running as it attempts to keep the house at my desired 69 degrees. I'm also aware that the girls have migrated up. It's got to be cold along the floor. My feet feel it. How much more do they feel?

It was a time of catch up and revisiting favorites. On Wednesday, I started the day by paying bills. Everything is paid. For me, this is a fantastic feeling. I look across the pile and there's nothing. This is a small victory, something I can pat myself on the back for. I figured it out. I have saved and I'm caught up. Off to do errands.

I am involved in something slightly nefarious so the first stop on Wednesday was JoAnn Fabrics for a couple items. Then, garbage stickers. I realized, in recalling my day for guild members, that garbage stickers aren't used everywhere. In Chicagoland, most communities have gone to a sticker program. You buy colored stickers that go on the garbage you put out. You pay only for what you drag to the curb. There is no charge for recyclables. I can go 6 weeks without putting out garbage, what with recycling and my lifestyle. Having a monthly trash bill is a waste of money for me. Stickers are currently $3.49 each, but that's still quite cheap to have it hauled away.

After that, I hit the post office and had a slightly annoying discussion with the clerk. Part of the nefariousness involves mailing and I knew exactly what I wanted to do with the mailing. "Why are you putting all this postage on these? Can't you make people mail it themselves?" I realize he wanted to save me money but I knew just want I wanted, I stated that clearly and I expect to be helped in that fashion. "We're up to this much already," he said, as if I hadn't thought through the cost. I knew how much it would cost me when I walked in. I've taken my business elsewhere when faced with this kind of "customer service". I came really close to saying, "Look, I know the cost. Just sell me the damn stamps. Stop trying to convince me to do this any other way because it's not going to work." Then, he wound up not selling me enough for the envelopes and I had to use the personal stamps I'd purchased. I've had problems with this guy before. I probably should complain.

From there, it was a stop to get the hair cut. I wasn't feeling particularly happy when I walked in. The post office exchange had me irritated. But, the gal who cut my hair was bubbly and chatty and put me in a very good mood. She asked about my hair care and made a couple suggestions that wound up giving me a cut that will last for awhile. It had been 13 weeks since my last cut. I do that. I get a great cut at Great Clips that lasts. Other than my bangs growing out, I really won't need to go back until maybe April. A hair cut made the irritation of the post office fade away. I'm happy.

It was time to go home. Did I want to cook or stop somewhere? As I headed west from the salon, I saw Flips approach. I haven't eaten there since summer. Flips it is. I got a #12, which is a polish with fries and a drink. Technically, I don't think that's on any diet plan but I am 'on vacation'. I'll eat what I want.

That carried through to Thursday when I stopped by Culver's after a doctor visit and another trip to JoAnn Fabrics. I got a bacon cheeseburger, fries and a peanut butter hot fudge shake. Culver's was on the way home.

Since then, I haven't gone anywhere. Taxes for both federal and state have been completed, submitted and accepted. There are small refunds coming. We've had brutal cold and snow. I've done wash. I've washed litter boxes and the floor where they sit. I've done dishes. I've crocheted. I've prepared all the valentines for mailing. I've ordered myself a small valentine's present because I'm worth it. I've slept. I've watched movies and Rocky and Bullwinkle. I've agreed with myself, finally, that I did need the time off and that just staying home really is worth it. Vacations don't have to involve the stress of packing and travel. They can be a time of catching up.

Back to work tomorrow. I will be rested and refreshed and will feel that I am not rushed because something didn't get done.

Beverage:  Darjeeling tea

Deb

Time Off

I've worked at my job 13 years now. It's easy to figure out because I was hired in 2000. This kind of math I can do. I've accumulated some vacation time. I've blogged before about how I struggle to redefine "vacation" into something that works for me. There is still this idea that a "vacation" means packing bags and going some place. It hasn't been an option for me in some time. My last "get away" vacation was last March when I went to celebrate April's recovery from a stroke. A day out, a couple days there and a day back, with a day to recover. Time spent with friends is never wasted.

But I haven't gone anywhere since. I take a day here and there; the day the plumber came to fix the tub drain; an extra day at Christmas; an extra day when Carole and David came for Niles' wedding. I think and sometimes dream about a week some place. I know a couple of friends are cruising this week. I did that once. It might be fun to go again.

After the blizzard of 2011 and the 5 days it took me to shovel out, I worry about not having vacation days to use if that were to occur again. So, I squirrel away days, not take them during the year, in the anticipation of something that, last year, didn't come anywhere near us. I think I shoveled twice, maybe, and that was, at the most 3 inches of fluffy snow. Hardly something to be worried about. I accrue new days on January 1st so I would have days if I needed them. The mindset still holds.

So, I find myself with 8 days to use up before the 31st of March. I'm taking 3 of those days beginning tomorrow. I simply told myself that I deserved them. It's quiet now, we're not busy. I can take those days. I'm entitled to them. What am I going to do with them?

2012 taxes. Tomorrow is the first day the IRS is accepting refunds and they have indicated refund checks will be delayed. I kind of feel like Ned Flanders from The Simpsons who always did his taxes on January 1st. I figure if I owe money, I have until April 15th to save up to pay. If they owe me money, I want that, as soon as possible, not in May or whenever it gets to me.

I'm going to run errands. The list is long. I need green ribbon. I need garbage stickers. I need stamps because the price of stamps went up a penny on Sunday. I'm going to do my grocery shopping and pay bills.

I think I'd like to see the animated movie, "Wreck-It, Ralph". It's supposed to be pretty funny and a 2nd run theatre near me claims to have it showing during the day. Then it won't conflict with my WOW playing. I think I'll order delivery pizza and take myself to Steak 'n Shake. I scheduled a doctor's appointment for Thursday during the day instead of making a mad dash at the end of the day.

I'm going to get caught up on the wash and I want to bake. I'm going to finish a crochet scarf and start another and I'm going to encourage the big black cat to lie in my lap all afternoon while I watch a movie and crochet. I'm going to research new computers and have my head so full of gigabites and flash drives and back-lit LED screens that I won't know which one looks the best.

I'm going to sleep late but try to rearrange my sleep schedule so that I'm going to bed at a decent time. I can get a solid 5 hours but that doesn't really seem to be enough for me. I sleep too much on the weekends and not enough during the week. RA has something to do with that, but it's also me and my chosen hours. They aren't conducive to good sleep.

And, I'm going to get my hair cut. It's too long. I'm going to get 2-3 inches cut off. I'm going to get bangs back. When I can pull it back into a decent pony tail, it's too long.

That's what I'm going to do on vacation. The biggest thing is not to feel guilty that I'm not going anywhere. Time off is meant to be taken and meant to be enjoyed. It's "me" time and many of my friends would argue I don't take enough of that.

Beverage:  Huckleberry tea

Deb

The Return

The computer is back. It works but the screen is slowly dying. I keep thinking I will be able to use part of my tax return for a new computer come February. And then friends say, "If we get a tax return" which starts the worry clock.

I watched more TV in 8 days than I did in the past 3 years, I think. There are some really, really awful Christmas movies out there. Just sticking "Christmas" in a movie's title does not guarantee it will be any good. Far from it. A movie still requires some semblance of a plot which some of these holiday movies didn't seem to have from the start.

I discovered the PBS "Create" channel. Heavily filled with cooking shows, it started off as something fun but I can only tolerate watching people cooking for so long before it's just boring. Another percentage is travel shows and those can be interesting. But again, I can only watch them for so long before it's just another place and you can interchange the country name with a different one.

"Miss Marple Investigates" was wonderful. I've read all of Agatha Christie's books so I enjoy seeing how it gets translated to the screen. There's usually one or two actors whose faces I recognize. In the one Miss Marple I watched, it was Joan Collins playing a socialite from New York. Hmmmm. Casting against type I see.

I watched "American Experience" and WGN TV's Bozo specials. I watched the news and the weather. I usually get both from the Internet. I watched football, all the football someone with free TV can watch. I watched "Bob Newhart" and "Mary Tyler Moore". I watched bits and pieces here and there until it got boring to watch more.

I managed to keep the worry monster away by concentrating on gratitude. At least someone was looking at the computer with an idea to try to get it working for me. Bill Moyers had a great program on Friday night discussing the "fiscal cliff" we've heard so much about. I actually watched a program discussing financial matters. After listening to the two people he had on his show, I am not worried much about the impending "fiscal whatever". That worry has been sent packing. It is what it is and I'll make do as I have before.


So, Friday night, I picked up the computer and set about getting the space ready again. A couple years ago, I realized that my chair made me spend too much time looking down at the computer screen. Ideally, you should look straight across. I looked around the house for something on which to set the computer to raise it up the required 3 inches. I've had this book "Asimov's Guide to Shakespeare" for at least 20 years. It's an invaluable help when I want to muse on Shakespeare's writings. It's also the perfect height to raise the computer up to eye level. So, I dusted around the book, moved a bunch of cables and set the computer back where it had been.

Then came the dreaded downloading. I have a new hard drive. Everything I had on my other hard drive has to be reinstalled. The operating system was an upgrade from the one I had been using. It has a few new quirks that are taking me some time to get used to.

Getting back online and getting my email services back up and functional didn't take that much time. Downloading World of Warcraft has been a trial. I think my Internet service throttles the amount of data I can download at once. I have 20 gigabites of data for this game and I'm downloading it in kilobite fragments. It's so slow. And when my computer goes to sleep, it doesn't download anymore so I have to supervise the downloading. When it's time for bed, however, I let it go and it just quits whenever the computer goes to sleep. There is a program I can download that will prevent the computer going to sleep, but I was able to log into the game on Sunday. I'll just keep going with the time I have. Eventually, the whole game will be downloaded.

I didn't really go through withdrawal without the computer. There were times, especially the first weekend, when I'd think, "I wonder...I'll just go look it up online...oh wait...", but, by Tuesday evening, I would come home, do chores, make supper and then sit in the recliner. Before computers, this is what I did. Had the computer been beyond repair, I would have been okay with that.

So, my eyes forward are toward a new computer. I don't know how much longer this one will limp along so I need to figure out how to pay for a new one. Computers are so much a part of life now and so much of how I entertain myself is tied up with the computer. Let's see if life lets me plan for a new one.

Beverage:  Edinburgh's Finest tea

Deb

The Last of the Tax Return

I've become, as I've grown older, rather anal about my tax return. It irritates me that my personal IRA takes the entire month of January to prepare my statement. I want to get the forms filled out and out of here. That way, if I have to pay elebenty billion dollars to the gov'mint, I have several months to figure out how to mail all those pennies.

This year, they were quicker and I received my statement on the last Monday of January. I spent the next weekend with TaxAct online doing my taxes. I had used TurboTax but found the fees they charged for electronic delivery to be distasteful. I've also found, and this will be the 3rd year of using TaxAct, that their forms are easier to fill out and they have suggested things I wouldn't have considered. I think it's your preference.

I was rather amazed at what I was to get back this year. It was more than last year. I wound up owing the State of Illinois an amount that constituted the price of a delivered pizza. I hope they enjoy it. Knowing I had this refund coming, I spent a whole week analyzing my financial life to decide the best way to use this.

I whittled down my needs to the following: 1) Replenish the savings account. This is kind of a no-brainer but with the financial problems I sometimes have, I have to make a conscious choice to put this first. 2) Fix the car. There has been a small problem with the steering dampener for over a year. It had a leak. It's not the kind of thing you have to jump up and fix NOW. It doesn't cause a safety or driving problem until the dampener is nearly empty. It just makes the steering column shake more when you go over bumps. But, I decided that I would fix it because I could and that would prevent a bigger repair later when perhaps I can ill afford it. Get an oil change and new wipers at the same time. I'm good to go now. 3) Get my eyes checked and get new glasses. It had been over 2 years since I'd done this. I noticed a very slight degradation in vision, not enough that I couldn't see, but enough that I knew I needed to do this for myself. I picked up my new glasses today. They are the ones on the left. Yes, there will be a before and after photo next week.

There was some extra after doing all these things. I saved my initial target amount and realized I could save more. What a wonderful feeling! I decided I deserved to take myself out and have tickets for The Tannahill Weavers and Red Green in concert, not together although that would be quite the show. I have not been to a live concert in several years. I couldn't afford it. I think the last concert I attended was with Pam and we went to see a Scottish Military band. Fitting that my return to concerting would be a Scottish folk group.

So, with the pick up of my glasses, the divvying up of the tax return has ended. I think I was much smarter this year, than last year. I don't think I planned as well. It's still baby steps to get where I'd like to be and sometimes I think someone moves the markers back. But I'm happy and that's what matters.

Beverage:  Dr Pepper

Deb

Quiet Sunday

With my taxes done, I can sit back now, secure in knowing I don't have that hanging over my head. It's funny how sitting at my chair typing in all the numbers which allow me to see that things haven't improved over last year could be so satisfying and bring such a sense of accomplishment.

I was going to order  pizza. I haven't had a delivery pizza in several months. I felt that was a good reward for getting my taxes done. But, there was a nagging feeling that the $15-25 spent on delivery pizza could be better applied elsewhere, regardless of how good delivery pizza tastes. Enter the co-worker with the "oops".

He accidentally locked himself out of the building on Sunday. He worked Saturday and was dropping things off on Sunday and doing his time sheet. He forgot to unlock the back door to the office so, when he went to get something out of his car, the door closed behind him and, yep, that will lock you out. I live closest to the office so I got the call. I got dressed and decided, while I was letting him into the building, I would get a few things from the grocery. It's right there.

Pizza money went to buy cat food. That's way more important than pizza. I put everything away, started a load of dishes and looked around. Peace. It was peaceful. I have a million things clamoring for my attention but I felt peace. I collected the materials for the next project, sat down in the recliner and proceeded, in between batches of dishes and the need for ear scratching, to stitch as much as you see here. It doesn't look like much at the present time, but it will in the next few stitching days, take form. This is a Christmas present.

It was so nice yesterday to get lost in stitching with the occasional getting up to wash another load of dishes and the scratching of ears. As I work on practicing gratitude in daily life, I am grateful for a day when I could easily shove aside all those "I need tos" and just be. It tells me I can be grateful for things and not concentrate on the laundry needing to be done, the windows needing to be washed, the stack of stuff in the office needing to be sorted. All those voices can drown out the one biggest need, to be grateful that I have what I have. That's what I got out of yesterday. Peace, quiet and the realization that I am happy doing the things I like to do.

Beverage:  Edinburgh's Finest tea

Deb

Reassessed

I got a letter from the County Assessor this past week. It's one of those things one views with mixed feelings. You purchase a chunk of land on which sits a dwelling. The "American Dream" has always been that you own a home and that home increases in value the longer you keep it. Yet, the greater the value, the more various government bodies ask you to pay in taxes. So you complain about your high taxes but don't want your investment to lose money. It's quite the conundrum.

I turned the letter over as I looked at it. Getting a letter means there is a change in valuation. I love it when a politician hollers "No New Taxes" but says nothing when existing taxes are raised another percentage point. "Well, that's not a new tax," is the answer. An increase is an increase is an increase. I go back to the old adage, "If it walks like a duck, talks like a duck and looks like a duck, it's a duck."

I opened the letter dreading to read what I guessed were the contents. To my surprise, my assessed valuation has gone down. It's gone down by a good 4%. Since my taxes are based on the assessed valuation of my home, perhaps next year will be a zero increase year. Whatever has gone up will be cancelled by the lowering of the assessment.

So what happened? My guess is the real estate market collapse has finally caught up with assessments. I have never been "under water" on my mortgage, owning more on my home than it is worth. When I refinanced several years ago, I made sure I refinanced only what was in the mortgage. I didn't wrap a whole bunch of other stuff in, like credit cards. My insistence that I only refinance the mortgage paid off in still maintaining equity when others lost. For once I did something right, even if, at the time, I didn't know it was the right thing to do.

Now, will I see a reduction in my mortgage payment if my taxes do go down? Ha! Let's just say the devil will buy ice skates before that happens.

Beverage:  Earl Grey tea

Deb

Celebration

Upon completion of my taxes, I decided I deserved something as a reward. I have no ice cream in the house, having consumed the rest of the Haagen Das White Chocolate Raspberry a week ago. I've had this craving for cake lately but have had too many other things to do to actually bake one. And yes, I'd make it from scratch, thank you very much. I know how to do that and it's not hard.

Mead. April and Perry gave me three bottles of mead back in August. He said one bottle was drinkable then but the other two needed to sit until probably Christmas.

Well, honestly, the thought of orange mead didn't appeal to me. I had visions of ORANGE and not some beverage that was complex or maybe orange flavored. I like orange but it can get way over-powering.

But, around New Year's Perry mentioned the orange mead was now ready and he was very pleased with how it came out. When I finished my taxes and got the receipt that they had been sent, I knew I needed to celebrate and my first thought was the mead. "Well, Perry says it's good now. I should try it."

I have a big bottle and a small bottle. I opened the small bottle and took a whiff. Very light, pleasing scent. I poured out a glass full and took a swig. Wow! Mead can be a love it hate it drink. This is incredibly smooth with just enough orange that you know there's orange but not enough that orange is all you taste. It is very drinkable and is just perfect.

Now part of me wants to consume all of it, it's that good. The other part of me wants to keep some set aside for very special occasions. But I don't know how home made mead keeps. I'm probably better off drinking the stuff than trying to extend some shelf life.

I can't wait to play World of Warcraft on Saturday. We have this ritual before we get started with the evening's events. "Hey Zel? What's the beverage for tonight?" Zel then lists what he's starting with and what else might be on the menu if the raid runs long. I can't wait to chime in, "I'm drinking 'Joe's Ancient Orange Mead'. Beat that!"

In case you're wondering, yes, I gave the ladies a sniff. They both looked at me as if I was insane. I swear there were wrinkled up noses under all that fur.

So here's to Perry and my new raiding drink!

Beverage: Scottish Blend tea (No, I can't drink mead at the office.)

Deb

I did it!

I have successfully filed my own taxes for the 2nd year in a row. I am getting a refund from the federal government, a bigger one than last year. I owe the State of Illinois a whopping $8.00. I'll take that.

My financial company was most apologetic about my being unable to access the documents I needed to finish my return. They reset all the passwords and I was able to log in, view and print what I needed. It took me an hour and 15 minutes to finish what I had started on Sunday, print and save all my data, and e-file with both the IRS and the state.

Now I wait, but it's done and done much earlier than last year. I will be able to sit back in April and enjoy my time knowing I don't have to rush around trying to find all my documents.

I think this calls for a glass of Perry's mead.

Beverage: Joe's Ancient Orange Mead

Deb

***Gripe Alert***

You can skip over this post today, if you like. I'm just going to gripe. These are listed in no particular order other than how my brain is ordering them.

1) My right knee really hurts this morning. I've taken aspirin and rubbed Ben Gay into the knee. My office is going to an afternoon White Sox game and the prospect of sitting for 4 hours at a baseball game is not appealing.
2) I'm really blasé about going to this. Last year, we went to the Kane County Cougars and that's lots of fun plus there's more leg room. One of the guys in the office rammed this idea through. I know. I know. I don't have to go, but it looks bad.
3) It's supposed to rain...again...yet...still. I can't put down the top on the Jeep because I've been sick and the weather has been bad. In previous years, I've had the top down for weeks already. It's June, for Pete's sake!
4) The catalytic converter needs to be replaced and I got a notice that the emissions need to be done. Well, the converter needs to be done BEFORE I get the emissions done or the car will fail. I don't have $700 to fix the converter.
5) I don't have enough to cover the bills this month. I looked at where my tax refund went. I used $400 to go to Seattle but the rest, and it was a chunk, went to survival. How is anyone making it? And the governor of Illinois wants an income tax increase from 3 to 4.5%. Everything has gone up except what I bring home.
6) I don't have any flowers planted in pots on the deck or in front of the house. I always do that. I can't this year. I don't have the money. I need to repaint the deck. I can't. I can't afford to buy the paint.
7) I'm still (pardon my french) bloody sick and I'm bloody sick of being sick. Getting better has been in very, very small steps forward.
8) The dating service sent me another name and I can just tell it's not someone in whom I'm going to find a friendship. I got the name on Monday and he's not called. I call him tomorrow so I can honestly say I attempted contact.
9) I have ants in the kitchen again, those itty bitty, less than one eighth of an inch long things. Betsy is such a messy eater that's why. It's just frustrating.
10) Carole's not coming for a visit. She's decided to save her money and stay in Seattle. I understand and it does make things a bit easier on me, but I miss her and sort of looked forward to her potential visit.

I think that's it for today. I need to wash spoons. I have to run over to PetSupplies Plus when we get back from the game. I am out of cat food.

Beverage: water

Deb