I gave myself a challenge to have a post a day, but, as you've come to see, I go on tangents where there are 3 or 4 posts in a day. I didn't set out to overachieve, it just sort of happened. In a year, I have talked about cats and socks and jazz and what irks me and what I like and my family and friends and food. I've gone through a whole change of seasons with their attendant photos. I've met people, lost track of a couple if the return of a letter after Christmas is any indication. I've grieved and rejoiced. I've experienced great kindness and perplexing antagonism. Life has been good and bad but mostly it just is. I think of the "Serenity Prayer":
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change
The courage to change the things I can
And the wisdom to know the difference.
I like to think, maybe it's delusional, that this has been the motto of my life since 2000. I haven't always succeeded in knowing the difference, but I have tried.
In March, I met with a guy from the development department of my alma mater. He was going about the country meeting various alumni, taking them to dinner (which I certainly appreciated) and talking about life, what my alma mater means to me. He asked how I saw life now and where I was going to be in the future. This caught me off guard and I had to think about it. I replied that I thought about the future as I looked at my finances, what can I do to make that part of my life not so rocky. But, really, I don't look that far ahead. I prefer to be here and now, in the moment. I want to see the blessings and the happiness in the moment. I may not have windshield wipers that work but the beading of the rain on the windshield is quite interesting. He said, "Wow. That is really zen." Once again, I was caught off guard.
In this year, I have come to see that life is what it is. I can no more control life than I can control the tides. There are sections of my life I can manage but the rest just is. Life is about fixing holes in socks, washing rugs that have been peed on, making muffins and sleeping. Life is about watching the clouds on a sunny day and walking in the rainy on yet another heavily overcast one. I'm thankful you have chosen to come along with me on the journey. I am indeed blessed.
Beverage: Huckleberry tea